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I SUPPORT THEIR CIVILIANS
Crazed suicide bombers on one side; highly
trained military on the other. How is a used camel
salesman supposed to make a living?
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I SUPPORT WHATEVER'S TRENDY
You're a Kabbalah reading, rubber bracelet
wearing, Paris Hilton fucking fool. Here's one more item
you can't live without.
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I LIKE RIBBONS!
Politics is complicated and war is messy.
But ribbons? They're pretty, like your mouth.
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(Front) THERE'S A FUCKIN' ASSHOLE
LOOKING AT ME
(Back) ...STILL LOOKING AT ME
Fuck
'em. Best of all it doesn't matter whether you're coming
or going.
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I SUPPORT SINGLE MOMS
It's
time to sit down and declare your support for single
moms. Won't you lend a lap?
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GO LOCAL SPORTS TEAM
AND/OR COLLEGE!
Show your support for your favorite
overpaid athlete and/or subpar student!
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I DID NOT GET BRITNEY PREGNANT
(I CAME ON HER TITS)
Oops, I did it again...I came in her
mouth, got lost in the game...ooh baby, baby!
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STOP CLUBBING BABY SEALS
They
never buy a round, they dance too close, and their
breath smells of herring.
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WHO NEEDS BIG TITS?
WHEN YOU HAVE AN ASS LIKE THIS
I couldn't poop for two days because my
ass was swollen shut. I never saw you, but you
violated me, you bastard jellyfish.
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YOU CAN'T HAVE MANSLAUGHTER WITHOUT LAUGHTER
Laughter is the best medicine. That is,
next to any sort of actual medicine.
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COULD YOU COME BACK
IN A FEW BEERS?
What you
might call skunked beer due to lack of knowledge
could be a tasty German-style Pilsner to another.
Or it could be piss.
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SOLDIERS NEED HUMMERS
PLEASE HELP SUPPORT THE CAUSE!
I know you're willing to lend a hand, but
what these boys could really use is a nice warm,
wet...protective vehicle.
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I ONLY SUPPORT GAY MARRIAGE
IF BOTH CHICKS ARE HOT
There's nothing hotter than two chicks
making out, unless it's two chicks making out while
they're on fire.
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THE FUNNIEST THING ABOUT THIS SHIRT
IS THAT BY THE TIME YOU REALIZE IT DOESN'T SAY
ANYTHING IT'S TOO LATE FOR YOU TO STOP READING
IT YOU DUMB FUCK
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RED = REPUBLICANS
BLUE = IDIOTIC CRYBABIES
Maybe those states are blue from all the
whining going on (and tears are sorta blue).
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BLUE = DEMOCRATS
RED = COMPLETE MORONS
Maybe those states are all just red with
embarrassment.
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ALSO AVAILABLE IN SOBER!!
My 12 step
program has an escalator, and a wet bar.
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I'M THE NEW POPE-
WHO WANTS TO GO TO HEAVEN?
Now
everyone will have mandatory premarital sex.
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WHAT WOULD JESUS DO?
(for a KLONDIKE bar?)
My 15
year old Christian daughter is very angry with God. She
needs prayer for all her anger against God. Please pray
for her & send ice cream.
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I MAY HAVE ALZHEIMER'S
BUT AT LEAST I DON'T HAVE ALZHEIMER'S
This shirt is for everyone who... who are
you people? How did you get on this site?
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TALK NERDY TO ME
How
should I manage my hacker? The same way you herd cats.
It can be a bit confusing; they're not like most other
workers.
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OB/GYN KENOBI
Use
the Force Luke... no wait, I meant the forceps... now
the Force... and now back to the forceps. Good. Go wash
up.
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STOP MIDGET ON MIDGET CRIME
There
are no small crimes, only small criminals.
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I'LL BE USING THESE
TO MY ADVANTAGE
The Maidenform company was founded in
1922, starting the convention of naming cup sizes A
through D.
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GO FUCK YOURSELF. I'M AN ASSHOLE AND I APPROVE
THIS MESSAGE
Paid for by the commitee to elect fewer
cumstains, and more assholes.
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I'D RATHER BE FIGHTING THE MAN
Elvis
was a hero to most. But he never meant shit to me, you
see.
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I BET YOU'LL VOTE NEXT TIME HIPPIE
Did
you vote with the majority...and stay home? Nice
going.
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EAST COAST LAWNMOWERS
Charles Henry Pugh was born in 1840 in
Newtown Montgomery. Unfortunately he never lived long
enough to see his first lawnmower.
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1f u c4n r34d th1s u r34lly
n33d t0 g37 l41d
And cybering doesn't count. And you can stop
saving yourself for Lara Croft.
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MEDIUM PIMPIN'
Fo' real it
don't get no mo' medium man. Don't trip, let's flip,
gettin throwed on the flip. Gettin blowed with the
motherfuckin Jigga Man, fool.
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I'M HUGE IN JAPAN
And
China...and Korea..and Thailand and... You'll have to
ask Bill Murray what the Japanese letters mean (hint
hint: big dick).
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I SHOULD BE IN THE KITCHEN
Stirring up an instant cake mix? It's the
perfect time to practice fractions. You can also count
the pieces of chopped glass you put into the beef
stew.
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SHITTLES (taste the asshole)
I
am sad to report that on November 18, 2001, my beloved
Shittles died from bloat. She will be dearly
missed.
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THERE ARE 2 PEOPLE FUCKING
ON THE BACK OF MY SHIRT...
JUST KIDDING, BELIEVE IN JESUS!
So
why do I believe in Jesus? Because he's real. That night
in the library, when I hit the bottom, Buddha wasn't
there for me.
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I'M WHAT WILLIS WAS TALKIN' 'BOUT
The
shirt NBC's Scrubs featured on their 3/30/04 episode and
the one we've been selling since 2002.
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YES, I HAVE PLENTY OF CHANGE
YOU HOMELESS PIECE OF SHIT.
THANKS FOR ASKING.
I
would help the homeless if I just knew where they
lived.
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I TAUGHT YOUR GIRLFRIEND
THAT THING YOU LIKE
In return, she taught me the Lambada; even though
it is... forbidden.
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I TAUGHT YOUR BOYFRIEND
THAT THING YOU LIKE
In return, he taught me long division.
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I SWING BOTH WAYS
Tarzan, Jane, Cheetah, a hole in a log- it
all looks good to me.
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FRAT BOYS GIVE THE BEST BLOWJOBS
This is just one of the things you learn
in "Animal House- the Director's Cut".
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BLONDES HAVE MORE FUN- and STDs
Q: What's
the difference between a blonde and a telephone?
A: You don't let your best friend borrow your
toothbrush.
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DON'T NEGLECT THE BALLS
Good
advice for golfers, tennis players, bowlers, and other
assorted cocksuckers.
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